I'LL BE BACK

WHAT … a terrible blogger I have been …

even after all those promises I would blog more!! Sick. Tired. Jet Lagged. Exhausted. Blah. Blah. Blah. We all have excuses … no more excuses!

I’ll … BE BACK … sooner … than … later … BUT ALAs. it cannot be right now and not later as I cannot breath through my nose. SINUS DEATH. I have … the SINUS BLACK DEATH … mark my words … I’LL BE BACK!!!

In the mean time, keep following and pursuing all those lovely dreams of yours and take vitamins and eat green beans and shit. Don’t get sick. Okay??

Time Traveler

Lately, it appears and feels that time is not on my side.

I recently read all about the notion that Edgar Allan Poe was possibly a time traveler a few days ago. After carefully considering all the facts (yes! Science! Real facts! Eureka!) I must admit I think he likely was a time traveler, but really aren’t we all time travelers?

I feel like I’ve been traveling through time since November 8th 2017 when many of us decided maybe it might be a good idea to travel back to the 1950s (it wasn’t a good idea, right?). I usually feel like I’m living in the 1800’s before modern medicine when I’m on the phone ghosted for a few hours to hear nothing but elevator music while I try to navigate our health care system for my husband who has been ill for sometime now. The jet lag I felt after spending time in the EU a few months ago took me to futuristic day dream lethargic avenues and states that could only exsist in in a time travelers universe....do any of you catch my drift? Do you feel like you’re a constant time traveler and not living in the present? Always jumping ahead to the future or falling into yourself in the past? 

I go back and forth.

Time travel wouldn’t really be so bad, not in the metaphorical sense as I have chosen to narrate with up to this point but REAL Edgar Allan Poe Donnie Darko type voodoo time travel...if only...I would fix all the horrible sound issues I have been facing lately with certain podcasting episodes I have released (yes! I am aware of this and I’m ON IT), I would sing more of my own material on the podcast as I would go back to a week ago and write that song instead of crashing out watching Netflix on my old smelly living room couch with coconut popcorn all over hands, mouth and stomach... : / and yes. If I really could travel through time I would live my days entirely for this podcast and everything else in life could wait because I would be traveling through time for Pete’s sakes! 

Blog conclusion? 

HOW DO YOU USE YOUR TIME?

Use it and use it well, but remember you’re only human, and sleep and health override time and space sometimes..and sometimes they don’t. If you run into Edgar, will you ask him how he does it (the whole time travel thing) for me? 

Thanks.

A Hot Minute *

Well...embarrassed doesn't really even cover it! I...there are no words. And no excuses really for why I haven't blogged in so long, I suppose blogging started to become somewhat too egocentric for me and I had to take a hot minute away from it, but here I am...blogging away again. 

2017 was easily the best and worst year of my entire life. It was the best because I started this podcast. I began connecting to so many of you as well as so many interesting humans on the show and I traveled more than I ever have in my life...how fulfilling and exciting and thrilling on a deep personal level. But alas, it was the worst year of my life because the one person I love the most on the entire planet fell very ill and continues to fight every day to keep his health, heart and mind alive. Why does life work this way sometimes? I don't know. I'm not a big 'everything happens for a reason' type of gal, but I do try to remain positive. I try. Hard. 

What was 2017 for you? Do you even place any value on time? I do and I don't. I don't believe in New Years resolutions, but I believe in keeping goals. I believe in the power of will power, ones self determination and that the human mind and heart are one extreme cluster of unknowns and hot minutes and emotions that make up who we are, even if time is endless and ongoing and everything, even if there just isn't always a reason for the hard times, the good times...you just have to keep going. Right? 

We are all trying to keep going and hopefully you're being kind to the planet and others around you as you follow and pursue all your dreams into 2018. I know I am and I can't wait to keep going on the ride with you all, thanks for going on the journey with me and yeah. I will keep coming back to the blog if you will :). 

Best as always ~ Ali 

GET GOING

When the going gets tough get going! Errrr...er...get going? Seriously? That easy...huh?

Sometimes it's so HARD to get going when it feels like it's just been one thing after another after another after...another ! From the world at large and all it's present insanity to the daily woes of my personal life as of late - I often find the magic motivation, that little voice in my heart that says 'Come on Ali, buck UP! DO IT!' to truly be difficult to find sometimes. 

Sometimes I'm about mantras. Sometimes Im about silence. Sometimes my ego ruins everything and sometimes really shitty things happen that are out of my control. Sometimes in certain phases in my life, life throws all of these things to me at once and I feel trapped...but then...

THEN!

I pick myself up and get going. What else can you do when the going gets tough really? Wallow in self pity and despair? No. Because somewhere deep inside yourself you must remember that you have the power to rise above your fear, failures, foolish pride and mistakes, heart ache and and and...blah blah blah you catch my drift! Dont give up on yourself. Not now. Not ever. The world at large...she needs our help, so help her out however you can (yes I am getting preachy as hell right now! I'm a getting going!) and keep helping out your fellow man and be kind to everyone, not just your closest of the close and be present and take care of your health so that you can help others and so that you are fully able to follow all those dreams of yours and truly go deep and look past your own crap and do it all for the sake of humanity and your heartself...DO IT ALL. It can be yours, mine, the world's...if we just get the fuck going and rise above the insanity. Just keep going. You can do this. 

I can do this ; ) 

Okay...Anyone watch the Game of Thrones season finale this past Sunday? Holy CRAP! Now...

Get GOING ***

*The Eclipse*

Hello out there! The Eclipse is on the way and I'm feeling it's bright earthy rays man. But seriously, I AM. 

I disappeared from blog land for a while, sometimes thats okay...right? I think so. I think it's okay to turn it all off for a spell, I mean...I didn't entirely turn off from technology...social media still has it's teeth sunk deep into my head but I'm almost there with digging it out. Scouts honor! 

What about you? Do you make time for your loved ones, your goals, your dreams, the planet and your fellow man? Do you turn off and take mental breaks? Yet.. manage to stay present with the world at large, concerned? Well! Do you? I'm cracking the whip down. On myself anyways. I'm making time for it ALL and more - whatever that may mean - but I'm also not afraid of what that looks like. Chaotic? Yes. But worth it? Yes. 

What does your destiny look like to you? How do you see yourself manifesting your dreams, your life, your deepest hearts desires? Whatever it look likes and sounds like to you...self care isn't a joke. MAKE time for your health and make time for the dreams and make time for the planet and make time for your fellow man...MAKE TIME for there is no time like the present moment!! 

 

 

Isolation Blows

Shit. Where does the time go anymore? 

After attending a wedding this weekend to those I rarely knew...I remembered how lovely it is to see two people truly in love tie the knot and be lovers in front of all those they love. SO refreshing. I mean...how else does one make time for all those they love these days if it's not a wedding, funeral, graduation, birthday party or some other 'I must be at this event to be a good person'...does this...make sense? And..me not knowing hardly a soul at the wedding, felt overwhelmed with love and joy at the sheer happenings of meeting new people and conversing and talking it about it all with passion and happiness and all that goodness, the type of goodness people feel when they all are collectively embracing and enjoying two souls shared love with one another. 

Wouldn't we...all be better people, wouldn't you be a 'good person' if you made more time for those you love and your friends and family even if it wasn't...an I'm supposed to be here type of thang? Put down your phone. Get the hell off snap chat and just go spend some time with grandma or your old friend from college who is in town or maybe listen to a cd (YES! a CD!) the whole way through, start to finish, with a friend and really dive into a meaningful conversation about the way music made you feel...I had a bizarre incident with a lyft driver in California recently that made me question my idea of human connection all over again...like so many of my interviews often do...and yes, truth be told...we all must commit to learning how to spend more time with our fellow man and less time wasting our neurons texting away, wasting away on social media platforms that leave you DRY to the bone internally. 

Passion and drive is all about PRESENCE. Human presence to be honest, is what it's all about and don't over think my flowery blogs posts...I think...you HEAR me? Right?

Now, go hang with someone you care about, the lawn and the dishes and all that bull shit...the computer, that thing at work, that stressful day you had...drop it and make time for others and your drive and motivation and all that delightfulness will return full throttle to reboot your creative and dreamy juices (gross..don't take it there!) 

Was my last post similar? Yes. Catch my drift - Isolation Blows!!

NOW more than ever is the time to connect more on that deep personal level. GO DO IT***

Happy Sunday lovelies ****

Breathers are Good, YES! They are though***

Work. Podcast. Travel. More Podcasting. Interview. Family. Husband. Friends. Eat. Sleep. Repeat. 

Go. Go. GO! Right? Right...? How do you define balance in your life? What does balance mean to you? I comprise a lot...too much... at times through lack of sleep and over working myself sometimes to what feels like the max. Thus, things become out of balance. I go back and forth between wanting to do it all and knowing deep inside that to do it all with integrity and the right 'energy' and to give it my best, that I must sleep. I must eat. I must make time for those I love. 

It's so easy anymore to get caught up in the present depressing state of the world. To become attached to your work emails on your iPhone and linger in vanity on instagram and snap chat and Facebook in the little free time you have outside of your brain going going going all the time. To slack on the process of your passion and begin to actually loose yourself to your own passion by striving for too much perfection. 

Remember to step away 'from it all' sometimes to keep everything in balance and kept sacred. Don't worry. Breaks are...a good thing for your brain, body and those you love. 

Does this all make sense? Okay. Im..going to do that sleep thing now***

Mr. Sandman, Bring Me a Dream *

Midnight. On the nose. 

I love working on all things creative by moonlight. I've always been a night owl..AND a morning person...a blessing and a curse that goes back and forth daily (nightly?).  It feels so good to be working on podcasting 'what have you's' late late on a Friday evening. With rain and snow slightly drizzling outside. It's spring. But early April in Denver usually says otherwise and you feel very alive. 

I imagine that whenever you are doing whatever it is you love, you feel the exact same way, alive.

Don't ever forget the moments you find yourself dreaming inside of, that you fell and fall in love with because you were doing something that made your spirit shine so brightly you could burn through the night sky like an alien invader glowing through space on a mission with might...

Your passion is your destiny, no matter what time of the day, the night...when it calls, embrace it!

*** Ali ***

 

Connection

Lots of interviews lately. The more people that come to the office the more I am reminded of how young I still am in the grand scheme of things...I learn so much about the world and the ways of the world and myself and others from each conversation with each and every one of my guests. 

Nothing beats having a mental and emotional connection to another human being in person for an hour or so in a world that demands we go go go to the point of exhaustion. It often feels like we don't have time to connect to one another anymore in that random way we all once did back when telephones were still attached to the wall. Back when the woes of the world were somewhat, or perhaps felt somewhat, simpler. 

Keep connected to those you love, meeting new people and going out and about in the world. Keep human connection alive. Discover others and discover yourself, and thus; discover your dreams ***

 

Nostalgia

In Colorado the sun is always out. Always. No matter how warm or cold is gets, the sun is ever present. Even if it's hiding behind a ton of clouds...it's there. I have lived in Colorado for some time. I moved to Colorado when I was 15 years old from Boise, Idaho were I spent the first part of my life. The sun today is making me nostalgic for my youth and for the innocent days of rivers and lakes and streams in the rural forgotten spaces of Idaho. Many of these places I long for were somewhat untouched by man, or so it felt to me in my childhood. In some strange and enchanting way my nostalgia inspires me to write today to podcast today to adventure into nature today to manifest something beyond myself today to continue to work hard to make my podcast even better today...ah yes. The power of nostalgia.

Feature Horror Film Director Jimmy Weber is on the show today and when we met recently he too, like todays Colorado sun, has made me reminisce and linger of days long past. Days when my life revolved around so many other things than that of connection through conversation and passions. Such a good Dude that Jimmy.

My advice? To myself? To you? Stay connected to your past, to your nostalgia, as much as you should learn from it and let it all go. Let the present moment consume, challenge and enlighten you and watch your future bewilder you in the most humble and surprising of ways. 

Flowery? Yes. True? Absolutely. 

***